Positive Thinking

Some of you might be thinking, “Oh No! Not more on positive thinking, we hear this all the time”. If you are thinking this, I absolutely understand. I mean, it seems that every bookstore is lined with books on positive thinking, one would expect there to be very few negative thinkers around, but the truth is that most people are still very negative in their way of thinking and it is definitely true that our thinking influences our attitudes and in turn our behaviour!

Recently my sister shared with me very interesting insight from a book that she is reading entitled “In the Early Hours- Reflection on Spiritual and Self Development” by Khurram Murad *. A very important thing mentioned in this book was that as Muslims we are supposed to be “ETERNAL OPTIMISTS”. This got me thinking about the hype on positive thinking and I realized that this concept is actually very prevalent within Islamic thinking.


The Prophet (SAW) described the Believers in the following words:


“Amazing is the matter of the believer, for all of his affairs are good to him. If a bounty was bestowed on him, he thanks for it, and this is better for him. If an affliction touches him, he observes patience, and this is better for him, and this is only for the believer” (Muslim).

This is a very beautiful hadith because it describes a very high form of positive thinking, and as it points out, this form of positive thinking has been reserved for the believer only. This form of positive thinking focuses on times of happiness as well as times of affliction, and I’m sure that you will agree that it is very difficult to practise this form of positive thinking on a continuous basis. But, with the right intention and with the guidance of Allah, we all have the ability to achieve this.

So, while general mainstream ideas focus on positive thinking to attain physical or material goals; the Islamic ideal of positive thinking is eternal, because one’s positive thinking, attitudes and behaviour is directly related to his/her relationship with the Creator. This form of positive thinking not only allows the individual to think of him/herself in positive terms, but to also think of all situations in positive terms and more importantly it encourages positive thinking about Allah and it leads to acceptance of what Allah has decreed. In this case, thinking positively will not only bring about peace and contentment in this material world, but it will also lead to positive consequences in the hereafter (Insha’allah Ameen).

The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) mentioned that even a smile is charity and this further emphasizes the importance of remaining positive. Since our actions directly influence those around us, if we remain positive, this will automatically help others to be positive as well, but if we are negative, then other people will continue to have a negative outlook in life, and thus ailments such as depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and so on will continue to fester. Islam is a religion which focuses on the well-being of all people, and it is not individualistic. People are taught to be selfless and not selfish and so positive thinking from this perspective has further reaching effects.

The concept of positive thinking is very much a spiritual exercise then, and it is a spiritual exercise which influences the human being on all levels. (In an earlier post we looked at balance and different levels- positive thinking would come into effect on all these levels).


Do the quiz below to find out whether you are an Optimist or a Pessimist:
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DO YOUR CLOUDS HAVE SILVER LININGS?

ASSESSMENT:

Answer “yes” or “no” to the following questions:

Do you:

1. Describe a half bottle of water as being half-full rather than half-empty?

2. Enjoy taking risks on a fairly regular basis?

3. Enjoy dreaming about what you might do if you received a lot of money?

4. Go on holiday without booking a hotel beforehand?

5. Feel your motto is to spend today, for tomorrow might never come?

6. Very carefully lock up before going to bed?

7. Feel you are someone who wears rose-tinted glasses?

8. Love getting surprises?

9. Feel that essentially most people are honest?

10. Always have something to look forward to?

11. Feel you sometimes are on a lucky streak?

12. Never feel it just isn’t worth getting up in the morning?

13. Never worry about whether your transport will fail and you will be late for an appointment?

14. Never bother to carry an extra article of clothing “just in case”?

15. Feel surprised when there is a hitch and things don’t work out according to your plan?

16. Feel delighted by the unexpected?

17. Feel things seldom feel hopeless?

18. Feel your future looks inviting?

19. Not care about growing old?

20. Have a hunch that existence will take care of you?
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Key:


If you have answered “yes” to more than 10 of the questions then you are like most people in your outlook-which means that you are balanced.

If you have answered “yes” to more than 16 then you are decidedly optimistic.


If you have answered “no” to more than 16 then you would do well to take stock of why you are so pessimistic and what can be done about it.

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Optimism suggests that we live in the best of all possible worlds, with a tendency to expect the best and see the best in all things. The optimistic person is seen as unusually cheerful and joyous. He or she is highly satisfied with their existence, generally finds life rewarding and is obviously at peace with him-or herself and the world.


By contrast, pessimism expects the worst and sees the worst in all things. The pessimistic outlook suggests that this world is, by its nature, corrupt. Pessimism is often associated with depression, anxiety and low energy. The pessimist is characteristically gloomy and disappointed with his or her existence. For them all clouds are stormy. Pessimists usually have low self esteem, believing that they are unattractive failures.


(Adapted from: Who am I: 101 Ways of Seeing Yourself. By Malcolm Godwin. (2004). United Kingdom: Carroll & Brown Publishers Ltd.)
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If you find that you are more prone to negative thinking- Don’t stress, Insha’Allah you have the ability to become more positive. If you are already a positive thinker, there’s always room for growth, and we are all on a continuous journey.

May Allah guide us all!

Insha’Allah in the next post we will look at some guidelines for positive thinking.

Until then, I leave you in peace, May the Almighty shower His Peace, Blessings and Mercy on every single one of us, Insha’Allah Ameen!
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*The reference for this book is: Murad, K. (2000). In the Early Hours-Reflections on Spiritual and Self Development. United Kingdom: Revival Publucations. (This book is available for download from: http://www.kalamullah.com/)
-Image reference-savethelobsters.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/i...

Life and Balance

My daily chores overwhelm me,
So much to do in so little time,
I cannot stop and take the time to see,
And not even a minute do I have to think about the One Above, most sublime!

Work, work and work…that’s all I can perceive,
From the morning till the eve,
My thoughts are filled with mundane tasks,
My life defined by a thousand masks.

A perfect depiction of ‘life in the fast lane’,
Sometimes I wonder if I’m going insane,
Stress is like my air,
And somewhere between, I can’t help but feel despair!

My family life is limited,
And it’s almost as if I’ve been prohibited,
From having peace and tranquility,
Oh how I long for more stability.

I don’t know when last I’ve read a book,
Or even taken out time to cook,
I don’t have time for exercise,
Perhaps it’s all part of the compromise,
But, the worst of all I can’t even say,
I can’t remember when last I put down my head to pray!

This cannot be the way to live,
This one-sided, way seems poor,
There has to be a better way,
More balance would be better I’m sure.

How do I find what I really need?
The things that I’ve always thought could wait.
What do I do to find the peace?
Before I wake up and find it’s too late.


Human beings are not one-dimensional. Alhamdulilla, it is a mercy of Allah (SWT) on us that we can function on many different levels. Thus, maintaining a balanced life is essential for our well-being. When we focus on only one aspect of our lives, (whether it’s work, or family, or friends, or even spirituality), then we will find that we can’t achieve true contentment, because our lives are unbalanced.

Islam emphasizes this concept of balance or moderation and it places importance on both the material, everyday tasks as well as the spiritual tasks. It is for this reason that forms of worship in Islam is not limited to praying or fasting only, but a simple thing like smiling at another human being for instance has been regarded as a form of charity, something which pleases Allah Almighty, a different form of worship. For Muslims, then, achieving a balanced life should be easy.

When a person’s life is unbalanced, then it makes the person more susceptible to physical as well as mental illnesses.

Insha’Allah in my next post I will look at ‘living a balanced life’ in a little more detail.

Until then, take some time out to reflect on your own life. How balanced is your life? Do you make time for different things in your life? Or, do you find yourself making much more time for some things than for others? If you’ve been feeling stressed out, angry, depressed, burnt out, etc… then perhaps the real problem is that your life is unbalanced…

What do you think about all this? Share your thoughts with us, we love to hear from you?

Until my next post, take care and try to live a more balanced life…May Allah make it easy for us all!

I leave you in peace!

In The Name of Allah, The Beneficent, The Merciful. All Praise is due to Allah, our Creator and Sustainer. May the peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be on the Blessed Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him), and on his family and companions.


“Verily We have created man in the best stature (mould). Then We have reduced him to the lowest of low. Save those who believe and do righteous deeds. Then they shall have a reward without end.” (Holy Quraan- Surah 95- Verse 4-6)


Introduction

If there’s one thing that most of us would agree on then it’s the fact that life seems to be getting more and more complicated. Never before have people being so connected to other people and to what’s happening in the world. Yet even though people are constantly “chatting” to someone, whether it’s on MXit, Facebook, via e-mail or through some other sort of social network, there seems to be more and more people feeling lonely, depressed, angry, stressed out, disillusioned, anxious, hopeless... and the list goes on and on!

Perhaps these are the consequences of a modern day society; maybe people will argue that we cannot get away from these things; that we just can’t help getting stressed out or experiencing road rage; that some level of anxiety, depression and even disillusionment is necessary to assist us to deal with our hectic lives. Maybe there are those that will argue that true peace and contentment is elusive. Then there might be those people who will insist that change is absolutely impossible, because no matter how one tries, nothing seems to work and their lives will always stay the same.

When I first began to study psychology I was intrigued- the various theories put forth about human behaviour on all levels, from cognitive to spiritual fascinated me. As time passed by though, I began to realize a very important thing, and this is that Islam inherently and naturally encompasses all we need to know to help us deal with things in our lives! Many of the things I learnt in psychology could also be found in Islam, even if it was put forth in a different way. The answers are all there, and the more I began to look for them, the more obvious they were. From time management to dealing with depression, anger and anxiety, the complete Islamic system provides guidance on how to deal with life!

Now I’m not at all saying that psychology is useless (I’d be quite a hypocrite if I was saying this). Psychology is very useful, but without the application of Islamic principles and means of dealing with things, it is incomplete. In my opinion, an integration of relevant psychological principles into the Islamic framework seems like the way to go.

So, that’s why I decided to start this blog- In order to shed some light on how this integrated approach may help people to deal with life better and to achieve peace (which is really not that elusive after all). So what I hope to do Inshallah is to discuss different topics (for e.g. dealing with-stress, anger, depression, relationship issues, etc). But it is not my intention to just write articles and post it here. I would really like this blog to be interactive. At times I will add relevant exercises, quizzes, practical things to do to help you deal... and so on and so forth. BUT- the more input I get from people the better it will be. So I would really like it if people posted topics that they would like to discuss (perhaps this relates to personal issues or more general ones, it doesn’t matter). I will try to address the issues people have to deal with by means of a new post on the requested topic and at the same time discussion from all individuals are encouraged and necessary so that we can all learn from each other’s experiences.

May Allah (SWT) make it easy for this effort to assist us all in achieving peace and contentment in our lives and I hope that we can also have some fun as we learn that life doesn’t really have to be so complicated after all!

Abdullah Ibn Amar (May Allah be pleased with him) narrates that Nabi Muhammad (Peace be upon him) said something to this effect; “Indeed the successful person is he that has accepted Islam, who has been granted sufficient sustenance, and whom Allah has granted contentment with that which Allah Ta’ala has granted him.” (Sahih Muslim, Vol. 1, p.337)

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) relates that Nabi (Pbuh) said something to this effect; “Wealth in essence is not defined by excessive possessions, rather it is defined by inner contentment.” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol.2, p.954).
For those of you (like me) who love taking quizzes to find out more about yourselves, I’ve added a link below where you can take different personality tests and get your results for free. There is one specifically related to this, called “Deal with It.” PLEASE BEWARE WHEN TAKING THESE TESTS BECAUSE PEOPLE OFTEN ACCEPT EVERY WORD THAT THESE TESTS SAY ABOUT THEM AND THIS CAN SOMETIMES BECOME VERY DISTRESSING. THESE TYPES OF TESTS ARE DEVELOPED TO PROVIDE SOME BASIC INSIGHT INTO AN INDIVIDUALS FUNCTIONING, BUT IT ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT DEFINE WHO YOU ARE COMPLETELY!

http://www.personalitylab.org


If you’ve taken a test, tell us what you thought of your results, or give any comment that you would like to, about this blog or anything else related. Let us know what topics you think should be discussed. The forum is open for discussion- Hope you all enjoy this! I'm looking forward to hearing your comments!

May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon you all!